i want meteorites and diamonds and mirror balls and icicles and glittery skies.

most days i'm freaking out. if only i knew how to stop it without you (your sweet lips, your voice, your hands, your warmth). if only i knew how to handle it without destroying myself.

what i like most about you is that you remind me of the me i would have been if i hadn't thought she wouldn't be good enough for life and the (assumed) expectations from people around her, people that had been in her life and people that were ever going to be in her life.

( you've got me stuck on repeat )

i have never doubted my fondness for you. not when i was leaving. not when everything was crumbling down. not when you smiled and said goodbye so casually.

today was an okay day which proved (to me at least) that:
a) i need physical things to reassure me of my existence (i.e. i bought stuff of which you can see a simple diary and a strapless black corduroy dress which i love to death in this photo, i also bought something else but i was too busy playing with it to take a photo.)
b) an okay day does not necessarily make a happier me, at 9.54 pm it has left me more anxious and rushed than a regular day.
c) i am happiest frolicking around half dressed.